I recently went ice skating for the first time this season. It was the third time on skates in the last 3 years.
I laced up my new skates.
I got on all my winter gear.
I walked toward the rink in the brisk dark night and then...
I hesitated. I started to do what I often do: overthink.
I stood at the edge of the rink, hovering between ice and ground, and I had a moment of doubt.
My mind slipped into fear as I watched other skaters struggle, slip, and grip the wall.
I wasn’t thinking about the fun to be had. I wasn't thinking about trying out new skates or that I had done this before.
I was thinking about falling.
I was strategizing how NOT to fall.
The problem with focusing on what you don’t want to happen is that it takes your attention away from what you DO want to happen.
When people come to me with concerns about filler words, I initially suggest we put them aside.
It’s not that cutting down filler words isn’t a worthy goal - we can always go back to it if it's still a problem - it’s that putting all your attention on what you don’t want to say is an unsuccessful strategy to create what you want.
It takes your focus away from the bigger goals:
connect with your audience
make your content relatable
get your message across clearly
get recognized for your work
It’s the reason that mindset is a key part of your success plan as a communicator.
Otherwise, you can have all the tools and strategies in the world but still be consumed with fear.
Want to learn the mindset for successful communication so you can stay focused on your bigger goals?
That’s exactly what I teach my coaching clients: the tools, strategies and state of mind to increase your confidence and get your message across in any situation.